


Of unexpected things, friendship and Hawaiian Christmases

by Charlie_Bb



Category: Hawaii Five-0 (2010)
Genre: Danny has a problem, Danny has a thing, Danny has also no idea how to deal with it, M/M, Most important, Mushy Danno, Pre-Steve McGarrett/Danny "Danno" Williams, first Hawaiian Christmas, kind of
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-07
Updated: 2016-03-07
Packaged: 2018-05-25 05:22:58
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,065
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6182089
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Charlie_Bb/pseuds/Charlie_Bb
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Danny has no idea why he started calling Steve “babe” in the first place.</p>
<p>It just kind of, sort of happened. Slip of the tongue, heat of the moment – whatever it was, the first time the word escaped his lips Danny almost froze on the spot from surprise. Not Steve, though – Steve didn’t even flinch and just rolled with it, as if it was just. Normal. </p>
<p>The second time it happened, Danny said it without even thinking; only, it didn’t really feel so wrong, did it? Steve, of course, didn’t seem to notice, or care. </p>
<p>Then it just kept on happening, sort of.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Of unexpected things, friendship and Hawaiian Christmases

**Author's Note:**

> So, this thing.  
> I decided last night to start an Hawaii 5-0 re-watch, because I missed my idiots, and Season One was so adorable I just needed it badly.  
> I think I wanted to write some porn, but then I was watching ep. 12, with the lovely Christmas scene, and this came out instead. You gotta wait for the porn, but I promise you I'll write some. 
> 
> So, yes, this is set in Season One up to ep. 12, I don't think there's more to say. Un-beta'd, so the errors are all mine.  
> A sequel might come up, sooner or later. I feel like I might need to write it, so be prepared.  
> Read, enjoy, leave feedback, start a chat! I always love to hear from you.  
> xxx  
> C

Danny has no idea why he started calling Steve “babe” in the first place.

It just kind of, sort of happened. Slip of the tongue, heat of the moment – whatever it was, the first time the word escaped his lips Danny almost froze on the spot from surprise. Not Steve, though – Steve didn’t even flinch and just rolled with it, as if it was just. Normal.

The second time it happened, Danny said it without even _thinking_ ; only, it didn’t really feel so wrong, did it? Steve, of course, didn’t seem to notice, or care.

Then it just kept on happening, sort of.

Point is, Danny is not one for pet names much, except when it comes to Gracie. No, Danny is a grown-up man, upright and serious, but when Steve is involved his whole world gets turned upside down for some reason. Which, Danny still struggles to explain.

He hated Steve’s guts when they first met, and then – and then.

Steve is reckless; he doesn’t think twice before doing something incredibly stupid – which he does, almost every day, if only to cause Danny an aneurism. Steve is mostly inconsiderate of rules and procedures, and Danny would really like to punch his face on a good day. It’s just.

Steve is everything Danny _is not_ , everything Danny used to despise in other people and now he just, well. He can live with it. With all of it, all of Steve’s weirdness and acts, which says a lot about Danny’s mental health, probably.

He cannot pinpoint the exact moment when he stopped despising Steve and started caring for him instead. It happened kind of naturally, smoothly, and the change just went unnoticed – until now. Only, it’s too late to try and stop it from happening.

So, Danny is man enough to admit to himself he has a problem. And that problem bears the name of Steve McGarrett.

 

*

 

It takes him a while, a few long days and an nth number of beers to realise what is _exactly_ going on in the damaged brain of his – damaged by one Commander McGarrett, of course.

The truth strikes him like a revelation in a hot afternoon. The sun is going down behind the horizon, its reflection slowly vanishing from the ocean like a stain washed off by a wet cloth; Danny is sipping an ice-cold beer when the impossible and unbelievable thought occurs to him that he _actually likes Steve McGarrett._

As in, romantically speaking. Which is ridiculous. Isn’t it?

True, in his youth and a long time before his marriage he might have developed physical attraction to other young men, but it wasn’t anything close to _romantic_. Besides, Steve and “romantic” don’t go well together. So what the hell is happening here?

 

*

 

Then, all of a sudden, Danny starts noticing _things_ about Steve he’d never paid attention to before.

Like the way Steve’s face lights up when he smiles, when he seriously smiles, and the room seems a little brighter, and a little warmer.

Or like the tone of Steve’s voice, low and dark and sometimes husky – Danny had never noticed that before. Or, well, he’d never noticed how much he unconsciously liked it, that’s more accurate. Steve’s voice gets to his head with the results of driving him mad most of the time, but there’s a smaller percentage of times when Steve’s voice is the only thing that can keep Danny anchored to the here and now, when the world around him starts spinning fast and panic threatens to get to him.

And maybe, maybe Danny has a thing for Steve’s eyes. It must be because of the way they seem to shine, to capture light from all around and reflect it amplified. Maybe it’s the look on Steve’s face every time they’re having an argument and they’re both exasperated, that half-homicidal and half-amused look that Steve seems to give him, and him only. Maybe it’s the lighter, softer look in Steve’s eyes when sometimes he turns to him, all quiet and with his lips stretched upwards, and Danny just. He just loves that.

So maybe, _maybe,_ there’s an incredible amount of things that Danny likes about Steve and never thought of before, and maybe, _maybe_ , it feels a little odd but also… nice. Like a tickling feeling inside his chest, warming and always present, which Danny can get used to, he thinks.

So, okay, Danny has a _thing_ for Steve. Which is… okay? Kind of?

It’s totally okay to have a thing for another man, that’s what Danny thinks. There’s nothing wrong with that, even Mother Nature created bisexuality in animals – see? Totally acceptable.

It might be only _kind of okay_ having a thing for a co-worker, these kind of things are not really acceptable in their line of work. Every police officer or law enforcement member who has an affair or relationship with a colleague has to be transferred to another department or break the relationship, and Danny can totally understand that. A link like that might get people in trouble, cloud their judgment while working on cases and such. It’s comprehensible, it’s only fair that this kind of behaviour needs to be discouraged.

Only, Danny is not a regular cop anymore, and Steve, oh, Steve has never been a regular _human being_ for what matters. Danny’s judgment is _always_ a little clouded when Steve’s involved, and the same applies to Kono and Chin – but that’s because they’re _family_ , so Danny is not really sure this might be a real problem.

The _real problem_ , here, is how Danny is going to deal with this – this _thing_ he feels for Steve. He can’t just go to the man and tell him to his face, can he? That’d be stupid, not to say completely reckless, and everybody knows Steve is the reckless part of the equation.

And even if he did, even if he told Steve, what then? He’d have to deal with rejection, which is something Danny is not really good at – because, come on, there’s no way in hell Steve might even _think_ of feeling the same way for him, which is okay, really. Well, maybe not _okay_ okay, but understandable.

So, back to square one. Danny has a thing and no idea how to deal with it, so he acts as nothing is going on in that chaotic head of his and pretends everything is alright. He works his ass off, stares at Steve when he thinks the other is too busy noticing, and jokes about women and getting laid from time to time. It’s not easy, but at least it buys him some time to make a call about it.

 

*

 

Danny thought his plan of acting normal was perfect, really – and, if he has to be honest with himself, it _theoretically_ was. Only, he hadn’t really thought of what exactly their line of work meant. For real.

He’d done the same mistake when he’d married Rachel, so many years before. He was young, and in love, and hadn’t thought about how dangerous the life of a detective might be. You’re here one moment and gone the next.

Life for them is a gift. They all wake up every morning thanking whatever God they believe in for the opportunity to see another day, and they pray that they can get to see the end of it unharmed.

That’s why when Chin almost dies thanks to a bomb tied around his neck, Danny almost loses it. Life is so ephemeral, so unpredictable, and maybe he’s an idiot if he thinks he has enough time to waste going around the problem without really facing it.

Steve would reject him if he told him, so what? If Danny were to die at any moment, he at least would with a clear conscience. Not that he plans on dying any time soon, of course, but having a member of their team so close to death somehow put things in perspective.

Thank God – or, more likely, thanks to Steve, Chin gets out alive and all is well again, and they can all celebrate Christmas back at Danny’s with Grace, and for a moment Danny just forgets about it all. Fear of death, fear of parting from this world with incomplete business, and they just get to celebrate the miracle that is life.

Danny doesn’t miss the soft look Steve gives him and Grace, though, and maybe it warms his heart a little.

 

 

It’s long past Grace’s bedtime when Chin, Kono, and Kamekona decide they’re too tired to stay and call it a night. Danny sees them out and returns to the couch where Steve is sitting and Grace is happily napping; he smiles as he look at her, his little girl, and his smile doesn’t fade when he notices Steve is caressing her hair, delicately. Danny had never thought Steve capable of delicate gestures – it’s a nice change to witness.

“I should put her in bed,” Danny says, his voice low as not to wake her up. He stretches out his arms to grab her but Steve is closer, and quicker, and has her in his arms in a matter of seconds.

“I’ll carry her,” he says. “Lead the way.”

Danny knows perfectly well Steve doesn’t need him to lead him through his ridiculously small apartment, still he obliges without complaining. That’s a first.

It takes them less than twenty seconds to reach the bedroom; Danny moves the covers away so that Steve can lay Grace on the bed, and watches him as he caresses her head before stepping back. Soft Steve is a new Steve, and Danny likes him. A lot.

He steps closer to his little girl, tucks her in and kisses her forehead before walking out of the room. Steve is already back to the living room, and in the few steps that separate them Danny has the time to think that maybe this first Hawaiian Christmas hasn’t been that bad after all. He walks towards Steve and a cold beer with a smile on his face, and he falls ungraciously on the couch next to his partner. They drink in silence for a while and Danny likes it, the safety of his home, the comfort of having Steve around even at this hour of night.

Danny is conscious of Steve’s gaze on him but right now doesn’t care. He’s been so scared the past few days, so angry the past few months, and this, this right here is the very first moment of true tranquillity he can recall in a long, long time. It might even be the first moment of true happiness in a long time, but there’s no need to tell anyone.

And of course Steve has to say something, and it’s almost like he’s reading his thoughts because he asks, “Wanna tell me what’s on your mind, partner?”, and Danny almost bursts out into a laugh, because Steve is everything he had never expected to find. He’s a good friend, and a great partner, and he’s as mad as a hatter but he’s here, always sticking around, and Danny likes that.

“Nothing, just…”

“Just what?”

“Just, maybe this place isn’t really hell after all,” Danny says, and he can see Steve’s smile out of the corner of his eye.

“So you don’t hate pineapples and sand anymore?”

“Don’t be stupid, that will never change,” Danny cuts him off. “But, yes. Maybe there are a few good things here, too.”

Steve smiles again and shakes his head, and Danny doesn’t realise he’s openly staring at him now. It’s just – Steve is good looking, and that’s a fact. Terribly good looking. But there’s something intimate in the way he’s smiling now, something that he doesn’t share with the world but somehow, for some reason he can’t understand, Steve has decided to share with him. Maybe Danny’s heart skips a beat or two, maybe it’s irrelevant, and maybe the too many beers they’ve been drinking are getting to his head, but now Danny really really feels like he wants to kiss Steve.

And maybe Danny should be keeping it all to himself, for the various reason he’s been thinking of the past few weeks, but it’s Christmas, and maybe there’s no better time than this to talk to Steve about this little _thing_ that is becoming a little bigger every day.

“Danno, what’s going on?”

Steve always knows, figures. He looks a little less relaxed now, and maybe a little tense, and Danny doesn’t know what to do so he just closes his eyes for a moment and shakes his head no as if to say it’s nothing. But Steve, oh, Steve knows him so well, he’s not buying it, and when he presses a hand on his shoulder Danny shivers a little.

“Danny, what’s –“

“I have this _thing_ ,” Danny says before he can even think of what to say. “It’s a… a thing, Steve, and I don’t know where it came from, I don’t even know why it happened, but it’s a thing, and it’s here, and I’m not sure of what to do.”

“What thing?” Steve asks, getting closer to him. “What are you talking about, Danno?”

“A _thing_ , I told you, and it happens because of you, I guess, which is ridiculous, I know, and I have no idea _why_ it happens because of you, but it does and I just. I don’t know, Steve, I just.”

“You just _what_? What happens because of me?”

Danny opens his eyes and sighs. Steve is not moving away from him and doesn’t look like he wants to, either, and Danny is so, so tempted to kiss him right now. He really doesn’t know how to explain that he’s got a _crush_ on his partner, and he surely doesn’t know how to explain it to said partner, and it definitely doesn’t help that said partner is looking at him as if he was the only important thing in this goddamn world.

“Steve, please don’t freak out, but I think I have a _thing_ for you,” Danny says quickly, and he can already feel anxiety taking its grip on him. His body is going to shut down, get rigid and all that, probably soon, and his hands are shaking badly already, and there’s a chance Steve thinks he’s an idiot, and he can’t stand it. So he shuts Steve’s hand off with his own and takes a deep breath, then a generous sip of beer.

“Danny –“

“Just – just ignore it, Steve. I think I just needed to get it off my chest, that’s all. We’re still friends, we’re still partners, nothing’s gonna change.”

“Excuse me, do you think I can say something or you wanna keep on rambling all by yourself here?”

When Danny turns to look at him, Steve is serious. He’s not smiling anymore, and Danny finds this extremely scary – not to mention he already misses Steve’s smile.

There’s no other way, the secret is out and he’s gotta be a man about this and let Steve say whatever he feels like he needs to say, which is probably something bad that involves them not being partners anymore. Danny starts hyperventilating the second the thought forms in his mind.

“Danny, you know what life we live,” Steve says slowly, and Danny can already see where this is going, so why not spare him the pain and get it all over with already? “And you probably figured out by now I’m nothing like boyfriend material.”

“Steve, can we please not do this? I think –“

“But you’re not the only one who has _a thing_ ,” Steve cuts him off. “And you’re not the only one who’s kinda terrified by it. So, er.”

Danny freezes on the spot and his brain decides to stop working all of a sudden. Is his hearing impaired or what? Has Steve gone crazy or – or –

“What do you mean I’m not the only one who –“

“I mean _exactly_ what you think I mean,” Steve says, and in his eyes Danny can see the same anxiety that reflects in his own. “I just. Why don’t we, er. Take it easy. Go for a drink sometimes.”

And Danny starts laughing. Out loud, head tilted back and tears in his eyes. Steve has a thing. Steve McGarrett has a freaking thing.

“Er, I don’t wanna be the killjoy here, but we’re already drinking,” Danny says as he shows Steve the beer in his hand. “And, we’ve gone for a whole lot of drinks since we started working together. And not ‘evening out with the team’ drinks, just drinks drinks, the two of us. So, uhm.”

Danny can’t stop laughing, and Steve is joining him now. The situation is kind of ridiculous, really, and they’re just two idiots laughing their ass off while talking about going on a proper date. Awesome.

“So, let’s make it dinner?” Steve suggests, but when he looks at Danny he starts laughing again. “Wait, you’re gonna tell me you already cooked me dinner tonight, aren’t you?”

“Stop reading my mind, McGarrett, I don’t like your Seal superpowers.”

“Okay. Fine. So, dinner? And drinks?”

They both shut up for a moment, and Danny is seriously considering Steve’s last offer now. Dinner and drinks sounds good, actually, really good as a first date – which, Danny can’t even think of because, come on, a _first date_? With _Steve_?

“Dinner and drinks,” Danny nods, and he relaxes back on the couch. Steve imitates him and they sit still for a moment, still contemplating that new idea. It might actually be nice to go on a proper date, for a change. Going on one with their partner should even be easier, even if Danny doubts it a little – they’re going to be all nervous and sweaty, probably, all stiff for a while until they’ll realise that, hey!, it’s still them, and nothing’s changed.

“Merry Christmas, Daniel,” Steve says softly, head tilted on a side to take a good look at him. Danny tilts his, too, and smiles when he meets Steve’s eyes. He maybe brushes against Steve’s hand with his own, and maybe Steve smiles a little and links their fingers together for a moment. Maybe Danny shivers a little when he spots in Steve’s eyes the promise of something new, and he hopes Steve can see the same promise in his.

“Merry Christmas, Steven.”

 

 


End file.
